Dr. Demetrius Mountain

the artist

Dr. Demetrius Mountain (Lecturer in Music, Rolle College, Exmouth)

Dr. Mountain was captain of the British Men's Aesthetics team until the late 80's, when in protest at Thatcher's neglect of the Arts, he sent back his medals (Manilla envelope, A4; black type, sans serif; second class stamp; deliberately did not use postcode, as a statement).

He has appeared on Vox Populi.

He does not intend to go swimming on the 3rd of July.

the art

Dr, Mountain works in grey. His early works showed restraint in the use of grey, and most were executed in fabric. He began in Islington, at the House of Nanking restaurant and dry-cleaners, with "Colours in a White's Wash". Then came "Low temp. White's Wash", "colours in a white's wash TWO (another shirt ruined)" and "socks". However, he came to notice with "Unbalanced Load", an installation of non-functional spin-driers, which won the Prix de Persil at Cannes.

The furore around the now-infamous events at Dr. Mountain's acceptance of the Persil has gone down in Art History quicker than Francis Bacon on a rent-boy. He appeared on the dais with a primus stove and saucepan of hot water, blanched Art's most valuable parsley for over an hour, and then HANDED BACK the now-grey sprig with the admonition: only this is worthy of my genius.

His success was assured, and as such, his output dropped to nothing. He is still working on his colour opera (using the Russians theory of Chromaticity) "Three shades of grey". The players are all in one shade and the background in another. The third is the denouement; "a greyus ex machina." according to sources.

the beret

The beret is grey.
The beret is felt.
The beret was owned by Beuys, and covered in lard.
Dr. Mountain has since washed it (40 degrees, enzyme action, no accelerator, no pre-wash, not environmentally friendly).
The Artist is underneath the Beret.
This is a statement.
It is also better that way.
Dr. Mountain is available for chat-show appearances.

Submitted by R.T.A.Hadden (rtah100@cam.ac.uk), on Monday, May 22, 1995, from Cambridge, U.K.