The MIT Beaver
the artist
The MIT Beaver. All it uses are its teeth and its sense about
monetary matters (which is none.) The MIT Beaver resides in Chuck
Creek in a town called Bohston, located in Massachusetts.
Here's what the MIT Beaver does. It is an artist - working with all
sorts of materials - paint, computers, chemicals, toxins, radioactive
elements, its teeth, etc. on just about ALL mediums - paper, the nerds
and geeks at MIT, professors, the great dome, the Green Building,
Chuck creek, Hahvahd (a small liberal arts college up Chuck Creek),
etc. Its budget? Who needs a budget when all the beaver needs to do
is the suck endless amounts of monies from all sorts of people -
nerds, geeks, professors, and Uncle Sam alike.
To see work done by the MIT Beaver, you'll need to travel to the town
of Bohston to investigate. When you see people with no money, chances
are you're witnessing the work of the Beaver. When you see a police
car on top of the Great Dome, You're witnessing the work of the
Beaver. The game tetris on the Green Building. The giant dollar bill
pained outside the wall of the financial office. The balloon that
blew up in the middle of a Hahvahd foosball game. Students that stare
into nothingless walking down the infinite corridor. All are works of
the beaver. Chances are, you have a piece of the work at your home,
too. The Computer is one of its more crazier works.
That's the MIT Beaver.
the art
A lot of the Beaver's work is temporary - people dislike it so much
that they have created a "Rapid Rescue Task Force" to remove the work
of the Beaver. But some are permenant works, like your dry wallet,
its endless quest for money and power, its own crisis with Uncle Sam
armed with the axe.
To see work done by the Beaver, you'll have to come to Bohston - but
beware - you might become a piece of the "art" if you're not careful
or too smart.
the beret
Ah - the artists's Beret. It's a hat in the form of the formula
f'(x)=(3u^2+4u+3) x (100x^99)^100 x 0. The hat is very popular among
people at MIT - it's everywhere. It's in your endless problem sets.
The Exams. Your books. Your lecturer's brain. The black board. The
students' nightmares. It's most likely the cause of ALL accidents in
this country. The cause of insanity. The cause of Suicides. The
cause of Evil and Revenge. And you can see it in action by paying a
$120,000.00 fee (subject to increase without YOUR approval) to be
admitted into the institution.
My name is Ho Yin Au, a student at the Massachusetts Institute of
Technology. I'm a friend of Sarah's, when she started working at
Malden Access TV.
My interests are playing the Piano and the Chinese Hammered Dulcimer,
creating drawings on paper and on the computer, like to manipulate
photo on the computer, want to produce or make TV shows, animations,
biking, ping pong, programming, HTML Authoring, net'surfing, and
writing (even I'm grammar deficient.)
Submitted by Ho Yin Au (hya@mit.edu), on Tuesday, September 19, 1995, from Malden, MA, USA